Lesbians, “what do they even do?”

The crappiest questions about lesbians, answered once and for all. So we don’t have to field these questions again, we can just point you to this blog piece.

1. Why do lesbians date ‘manly’ women, why not just date men?

Because, we’re not attracted to you. ‘You’ being the kind of people that ask this question, irrespective of your gender, you’re a big no no. As for ‘manly’ women, let me tell you something,


If she is born female and prefers being female, she is a woman.
Was she born male and prefers being female? yeah, she is a woman.
And if she is feminine and prefers being female, she is a woman.
Even if she is masculine and prefers being female, guess what? she is a woman.


I’m not going to sugar-coat this for your thick head, a person that prefers being a woman IS. A. WOMAN. Birth gender, clothes, haircut, voice, mannerisms notwithstanding.
And who are lesbians attracted to? WOMEN. So that is why we don’t date men, Steve.

2. What if you just haven’t met the right man?

Bye dolphin

I could be his wing woman! I’m a dope wing woman, unless I like the girl. You know what? He will be fine, plenty straight women around for him. And SO MANY hetero dating apps to help him.

3. Is scissoring a thing?

Rachel Maddow gif for lesbians articleYes, but it is not how porn portrays it. I’ve personally, never reached climax through it, it requires a certain level of athleticism that my body and back refuse to allow me. And it isn’t our only option. 😉

4. If I ask you nicely, would you let me watch?

Lesbians punch

If I ask you nicely, would you let me punch you?
I’ve a feeling you don’t get it. I’m not your fetish, I’m a person. What you’ve just asked is stupid, hurtful and not okay.
So how about you turn around and walk off the stupid.

5. Aren’t lesbians just trying to be men, why not transition?

No, lesbians aren’t trying to be men, they’re just trying to meet another lesbian girl. The only thing common between hetero men and lesbians is that we both want a girl that likes women.

6. But… you don’t look like a lesbian.

lesbians reaction

Well, you don’t look like a stereotyping, uneducated, homophobic dung bag either.
Last I checked, there was no look assigned to us Lezzers, and if there was, believe me, we would’ve owned it. JUST because it is hella hard to figure out if the girl you like is gay or not.

7. How do you have sex?

We have sex privately, in our bedrooms (Mostly) and it is none of your business. Unless you’re a single, curious woman. But just so you don’t ask this extremely private question to anyone else, let me tell you. And do take notes, you hetero folks need it.
– We have oral sex, the main organ used is the tongue with optional guest appearances made by the fingers, nose, a toy etc. But even the plain old tongue works brilliantly.
– We have assisted penetrative sex. NO that is not an invitation Steve, do you want another punch? I mean we use toys and there are SO MANY to choose from, they come in so many colours, and features. To me, they’re just better than your un-manscaped third leg.
– We use our fingers.
The thing is, women actually know where the clit is, unlike most men so we do whatever it takes to make it happy. Don’t compete, don’t ask, just learn.

8. I hope you won’t hit on me when we’re drunk.

Not in a million years, but if you’re a cis-het woman that I’m out to, chances are, you’ll be hitting on me close to your 4th shot.
But don’t worry, I know drunk consent is not consent. You’re in safe hands.

 

So, there you are. These are questions I’ve been asked a lot, if you have such gems, do share them with us in the comments. I’ll be more than happy to write a part II of this article!

Have a gay day!

Leave a Reply